today i had a man tell me, in all earnest, that i obviously wasn’t very good at my classical studies degree because zeus only had one son, hercules - his source was the disney movie hercules
video game challenge — (1/5) quotes
“Because you still have hope that this war will end with your honor intact.”
“I do.”
In Which I Mock Victorian Arthuriana, Because It Deserves It
These are all from a 1910 Morte d'Arthur by William Russell Flint, and are a fine example of why the Victorians should have been kept away from everything medieval with a very large stick.
“Can you tell I’m not wearing a bra?” "I dunno…kinda? But in, like, a good way?“
“THAT scabbard with THOSE shoes?”“Bitch, THAT crown with YOUR face?”
“Imma cut a bitch!”
“Okay, okay, but like, not in front of everybody, jesus, man.”
“This fight choreography is laaaaame, the guys last week were so much better.”
“Omigod! I’m fangirling so hard right now!”
“What the hell, Megan, get your shit together.”
“Nooo, not the boobs!”
“Nooo, not the boobs AND the booze!
“Nooo, too many boobs!”
“How long do we have to hold this stupid plate up?”
“I dunno, until they notice how hot we are?”
“They’re busy with that damn nun and my leg is in anatomically impossible position, Margery!”
“I specifically requested a FRESH head, this shit is how old?”
“Where the hell is the total on this receipt? Damn it, CVS!”
“And speaking directly into the microphone, could you please tell us ALL the sordid details for the tabloids?”
“Dude, how do you even get INTO that position?
“There are not many persons who know what wonders are opened to them in the stories and visions of their youth; for when as children we listen and dream, we think but half-formed thoughts, and when as men we try to remember, we are dulled and prosaic with the poison of life. But some of us awake in the night with strange phantasms of enchanted hills and gardens, of fountains that sing in the sun, of golden cliffs overhanging murmuring seas, of plains that stretch down to sleeping cities of bronze and stone, and of shadowy companies of heroes that ride caparisoned white horses along the edges of thick forests; and then we know that we have looked back through the ivory gates into that world of wonder which was ours before we were wise and unhappy.”
— “Celephais” by H.P. Lovecraft
thelibraryiscool